Tuesday, September 15, 2009


If one more person in my office uses the word cunt, because they think they are so cool and they can use it to describe anything from a sandwich to the car they dislike, I will kick the moron where it hurts the hardest.

The reason I say this is because it is the guys who use it.

No, it is not funny. Not funny at all when you’re in a room with a bunch of guys, and it is supposed to be serious meeting, and you are the only woman around, and the guy who's leading the show starts to say, “ Let's go get those cunts”

First time it happened, I didn’t react. Thinking I’ll seem so prissy. But now it’s like the worst sort of contagious disease going around.

And one that I’m not sure how to handle. I don’t feel like laughing because honestly, I don’t find it funny that you’re calling the canteen guy a cunt. I don’t find it cool because at some level the guys who’re saying it seem so pathetic with their desperate need to be noticed.

I just find it very offensive. It’s like those crappy sexual jokes that guys make around you. And these are guys who are not even your friends. They are just some idiots who work with you. They obviously think they can get away with it, because if you complain you’ll just seem like such a dork who’s so not with it.

Also I’ve noticed when very junior guys say stuff like this, everyone looks at them disapprovingly. But if the guys with the fat pay packet and even fatter designations say cunt all the time, nervous giggles are soon replaced with everyone calling everything cunt.


That’s the problem with so called liberated work places. People will do anything to seem cool.

now that i have vented, i shall leave you with someone who was really really cool. ibrahim ferrer. a introduced me to buena vista social club some years back, and i was hooked.

this is probably how i'd like to lead my life. sitting in the shallow waters of palolem, thinking of nothing and listening to ibrahim ferrer.


The Panorama said...

I can imagine your frustrations. The modern woman is caught between battling the oblique sexism in the work culture and yet trying to distance herself from the "feminist" stamp that has somehow become a ngative thing.
Just laugh and say " yeah and while we are at it, lets kick some balls too!!" am sure they will stop laughiung!!!

As the Mind Meanders said...

I know this.. I know this... its an "I can abuse and Its so cool that no one can do a shit" thingie... trust me... these morons have to do this so that they dont look duh... and these dodos stand out in interviews if you really push them... its just that morons hire morons in most corporate firms...

Kick them AGG or sexist as it may be ask them why they compare everything uncool or conquerable to their mothers privates... yuppies they may be but they still Indian mammas boys and I bet they cry every time someone sings a soppy song about "Ma.. meri ma... pyari ma" and then go around saying cunt when they cant find another word in their severely challenged vocabulary

slash\\ said...

Yeah seriously. Dickheads. Dropping abuses in every sentence just to sound cool. Puntos. Shallow they are. Like the waters of Palolem beach.

Good to know a fellow Palolem fan btw. My fav in Goa. Hope it doesn't get too popular though.

Pancho! said...

Speaking of hypocrisies...

Just how many times (and for how long) have women used the words "prick", "dick", "lund", or even "choot" (?!?) to describe men of a certain sort...?

Spazsim Chasm said...

@ agent: i so can relate to this right now!

@ Pancho... men use those words more than women do. yes, women do use them... but only when provoked... i certainly don't call my canteen guy a penis by any other name.

Anonymous said...

This is so true..So true..I understand everything you have felt in your workplace so so well...Have wanted to write on this so many times..And then I see that you have!...I choose to ignore...Why get affected?

mentalie said...

i worked at an agency once where an office meeting was held to introduce the new national creative director. the NCD ended the meeting by leading the office in what i am sure he thought was an uber cool cheer: 'we are FUCKIN' good'. i thought it was just so fuckin' sad - a 52 year old man yelling FUCKIN' to fit in and an entire office of cool advertising dudes/dudettes yelling FUCKIN' back because they can.

Miri said...

Something seems to have snapped inside me once I crossed into my 30s - I don't care anymore if I come across as a dork or prissy. Life is too short to keep fuming and gnashing your teeth on the inside.

Good suggestions from Panorama and As the mind!

agent green glass said...

@panorama and ATMM: ya. i think i was just plain hassled that day. usually i just ignore them. but the thing about bothering to stop and tell them how stupid they are usually doesn't work. a) because they have fragile egos. b) i don't even want to give anything they say any importance.

@slash: palolem aah. i dream of palolem.

@pancho: well, i think spazsim answered that better than i could have.

@spazism: we work in the same industry, so ya we meet the same jerks.

@choco: i agree. ignoring them is the best thing you can do. nothing gets them more wound up, than when you ignore them, preferably with a smirk on your face.

@mentalie: whew. i'm glad to be out of this desparate to be cool system.

@miri: agree. too short to grit and gnash. i'm just going to go have a beer instead. aah. the joys of notice period.

ani_aset said...

that is surely disgusting..how can they do that at work??
aah for palolem bliss :D

Meghana Naidu said...

First of all i was born in Goa.(ive been splattering that all over blogger for the past week now :D ) *does the woohoo woohoo dance*

i feel your pain.
Once in class my classmate threatened to spill water over my project sheets and frustrated as i was i said 'fuck you'
he said 'when?'
i broke my T-scale(a rather longish drafting plastic scale) over his head.
but yeah i agree with your "i wont say anything to remind them they still exist in my world" tactic ;)

PS: why dont you put a gooey cup-cake in their desk drawer? i've found it to be very satisfying, especially if its a week old and pineapple-vanilla.