Sunday, July 5, 2009

your guess is as good as mine. and let's not even talk about his.

So the MET department predicts heavy rain for today.

And guess what, it hardly rains. In fact, the sun comes out and sniggers at them.

How do they do it? Every time without fail.

Last year, after four days of incessant rain the MET department declared they were caught unaware. A raincloud that was headed for Brazil decided to relieve itself on us. Dude, four days of incessant rain. Every road is flooded, every building has turned mossy green, everything is dripping wet. And it takes a bloody genius to realise, “ oh wait, that dark as thunder rain cloud...the one that had been building up for days... he wasn’t just resting his tired legs, he is...he is... the...the...MONSOON!”

This year they said the rains are coming, they have reached Kerala, so they should be here in four days. Guess what. Eleh po! Nada!

Then after two weeks they said, “Ummm...this is a deviant monsoon. But it has reached Goa. Should be here in two days.” Guess what again. The monsoon did not get a seat on the Konkan Kanya. No sign of it for days.

Then they declare that it will be a slightly deficient monsoon. What does that mean? It means my ass. It means some idiot who’s sitting with a three chits that says rain, heavy rain, no rain has no clue about anything, and is just saving his skin.

And oh by the way, just as they say that the heavens open up!

That brings me to my next question. What exactly do you need to study to become a MET officer? The ancient study of runes? Astrology for Dummies? ESP gone horribly wrong?

And what about the weatherman’s kids? What do they do? Can they insult dad by openly carrying an umbrella just after he says no chance of rain today?

And does his wife snigger when he announces, “ Today will be bright and sunny”

Or does she just run out and pull the clothes off the line?

11 comments:

Screenage Scribbler said...

LOL !!!

slash said...

heh. true. But can't say they aren't helping. All you need to do is expect the exact opposite of what they say. For which, you need them to predict SOMETHING.
But, cmon, give them a break will ya. We can see how predicting the weather can be near impossible. They probably have families to feed, so let them have their jobs. There are lot more other government officials who are doing a lot more damage.
The last three post titles are songs. Are we seeing a pattern here? (viz. influenced by the musical significant other?)

Saltwater Blues said...

yeah i was surprised too. they had predicted thunderstorms for sunday and we barely had a drizzle. its gotta be the best job in the world ... no wories even when you get it wrong!

As for the kids I'm sure after seeing what a cushy job dad has they wanna be weathermen too!

Meghana Naidu said...

ah the weatherman's wife is a often unexplored and neglected subject. thank you for giving her voice.
:P

i like your style ;)

- a chance visitor

LostLittleGirl said...

haha. That is exactly what I was talking about a minute back. Like how yesterday it was supposed to be heavy rain day and it didn't pour shit. Seems like you need to be very drunk and entertain people with your guess work. Would be fun to be in the MET.

As the Mind Meanders said...

Come on AGG... Dont be such a pain... give them a break... at least they are consistant... Its an advanced acquired skill... never getting anything right anytime...

I also wonder, how many of their forecasts are driven by 'other' incentives... I mean one little pronouncement (rain shortfall) and there are exceptional budget allocations... and the trickle down effect...

And conspiracy theory apart... I wonder if their systems and equations ever evolve to factor in global climate changes...

Dr. Rupa Shah said...

After hearing that airport runway is not functioning due to heavy rain, Atul panicked. We decided to runaway to my parents house on saturday night...and as soon as we left, it stopped raining! Next morning, we came back and decided to ignore all these predictions. Take life each day as it comes, look at the sky and trust your gut feeling...and enjoy rain this & every monsoon completely!

♥ÐÅyÐяєÅмє®♥ said...

heheeheheh

I prayed that it don't rain :P

I was returning from home na

bheeg jata toh :O

Kaddu said...

LOL! Amazing really... how they ALWAYS get it wrong! Agree with ATMM... some consistency being shown!

Kokonad said...

LOL! Loved the part about the kids and the wife! Heh heh heh heh!

ani_aset said...

hehe weatherman ne dekha na to maar padegi...he is already very frustrated...I cant imagine how the weather was actually mocking the MET guys by actually giving a total
full on shiny smile, when MET predicted heavy rains :P