Tuesday, April 14, 2009

men, mister, master and other musings

I just spent the whole day reading a book borrowed from an eleven year old girl.

So there I was sprawled on the futon, my legs on the backrest, as I gobbled up a vampire love story, Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.

The book is a pretty racy read, though in parts the lovelorn bits were too much. Even though I know those are the parts making young girls swoon.

But the point of this blog is to wonder what makes us, as girls and women, go weak in the knees. I remember reading Nancy Drew at eleven. And she had a boyfriend. But there was no weak in the knees about him. He was just a wholesome American boy who did everything Nancy said.

Then I remember Pride and Prejudice. And Mr. Darcy. The first character in fiction that I fell in love with. I adored his aloofness. His air of mystery. The misunderstood man. The man who could be so sarcastic and yet you would want to fling yourself at him.

Then came Karan Kapoor. The Bombay Dyeing Man. And suddenly every young teenage girl was softly singing dream lover while looking into the horizon. Dream Lover had no time for nonsense. He would sweep you of your feet, without your permission.

Then I read this book...and my mind is ticking. It’s the same thing. A vampire who been there, done that. Lived in millions of cities, through thousands of centuries. And now falls in love as a teenager, and spends the entire novel saving his mortal woman.

 Say what you may, women don’t change. At the heart of it all they want a masterful man.

Sure, I don’t mean he should bully me around, or dictate who I meet or what I do. Yesh

But...haven’t you ever been swept away into a kiss that you didn’t realise was coming. Or had your hand grabbed and taken to places without you having a clue. Or just the way a guy has asked you something or said something, or taken charge. No hesitation, no can I, is it okay... just full on confidence. And you are like wow...you are my daddy!

That’s really it. Warped as it may sound. Sometimes a guy just has to be masterful enough for you to feel like a silly girl who’s got this daddy guy who’s going to manage it all.

And you start unconsciously reacting to that strange complex feeling right from when you’re eleven to probably when you’re sixty.

So men, there’s a lesson here. And a disclaimer. The woman has to feel that about you. And you got to gauge when she does. Do not try it if you ain’t hundred per cent sure. Many masterful men have got kicked in the balls!


doingmything said...

Good stuff, agent green glass, good stuff!

Jenna said...

See, I disagree.

But only 'cause, well, let's be honest. You've met my man. He's not Mr. Darcy, and he's not Karan Kapoor. He doesn't take charge.

...and I love it (and him) just that way.

I've dated guys like the 'masterful men' you speak of, and in the end it's always ended in a deepening spiral of arguments, because at the heart of it, I'd rather be in charge than have a man sweep me off my feet without my permission. Masterful men don't like that.

agent green glass said...

oh jenna, i agree with you. masterful men are not easy. and if you landed up with a man who was, well, always masterful, i suspect it wouldn't be easy. like you say deepening spiral of arguments etc. i once dated a man like that, and i knew we would never end up together. but...whatever your man is like, sometimes he needs to be masterful. that was my point. sometimes you need to feel like " ooh mr darcy, where did you come from!"

sachin kundu said...

I agree with you agent.First hand experience. Women like men to secretly take charge. The idea is secretly. Small things matter. Asking for a kiss is so wussy. If you don't know when to kiss a woman then don't !! Magic combination is being cocky and funny. Remove any and it turns out bad.

agent green glass said...

hey sachin. not bad dude. you hit the nail on the head. if you practise what you preach, you should be doing very well with the ladies! : ))))

Jenna said...

I dunno, I still prefer being in charge. Now if we're talking about taking charge in giving kisses, buying flowers or remembering that I said I liked X and picking up X at the store for dinner, then that's cool.

But I wouldn't want anyone to secretly take charge of, say, our vacation plans. Even in the name of romance.

And I like funny but I don't like cocky. I've got enough cockiness for two people so if my boyfriend were cocky, there'd just be too much of it in this relationship! :)